The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom

The Four Agreements is one of those rare books that looks simple when you first read it, yet becomes deeper and more powerful the more you work with it. Most people know the four agreements: Be Impeccable with Your Word. Don’t Take Anything Personally. Don’t Make Assumptions. Always Do Your Best. They are simple enough to understand in a few minutes, but living them can become a lifelong practice. What I especially appreciate about this book, however, is that it is about much more than the four agreements themselves. One of the most profound ideas in the book is domestication—the way we are conditioned from childhood to accept other people's beliefs, rules, judgments, expectations, and definitions of who we are. Ruiz describes how, eventually, we become our own domesticators, continuing to judge and punish ourselves according to a belief system we never consciously chose. This, to me, is the deeper purpose of the Four Agreements: they are tools for undoing domestication. We have accumulated thousands of agreements about ourselves, other people, life, love, success, failure, what is possible, and what we believe we are worthy of. Ruiz explains that many of these agreements are based in fear and consume enormous amounts of our personal power. Breaking those old agreements allows that power to return to us. And this leads to another aspect of the Toltec path that I believe deserves far more attention: recapitulation. Recapitulation—the conscious review of our past experiences, beliefs, agreements, and emotional patterns—is a powerful way of becoming aware of what has been running our lives unconsciously. In Beyond Fear, Ruiz develops this process more explicitly through what he calls the inventory: going into the mind, examining our belief system, discovering the agreements we have made, and breaking them one by one. He also emphasizes the importance of reviewing our past without the Judge and Victim taking over, but instead seeing it “with the eyes of love.” This is why I don't see The Four Agreements simply as a collection of four helpful rules. I see it as an invitation to wake up from an entire system of conditioning. Ruiz calls this the Art of Transformation. We become aware of the fear-based beliefs and agreements that make us suffer, reclaim our personal power, and gradually replace those old agreements with new ones. And there is something beautifully practical about the process. We don't have to transform everything overnight. We practice. We fall down. We begin again. We do our best today. Then we do it again tomorrow. Over time, the new agreements become stronger and the old ones lose their power. That is the real gift of this book. It doesn't ask us to become someone else. It invites us to discover how much of what we think we are has been learned—and then gives us practical tools for becoming free. If you love The Four Agreements, I highly recommend continuing with Don Miguel Ruiz's other work. In particular, Beyond Fear takes many of these ideas considerably deeper, especially the work of inventory, awareness, fear, and freedom. I also highly recommend The Five Levels of Attachment, which offers another powerful way of understanding how we become identified with our beliefs and how we can loosen their grip. For me, The Four Agreements is not merely a self-help book. It is a practical spiritual teaching about reclaiming our freedom from the conditioning we have mistaken for ourselves. I have returned to these teachings again and again, and I continue to find new depths in them. Five stars without hesitation. If you are ready not merely to improve your life, but to question the agreements and conditioning that have been creating your experience of life in the first place, I cannot recommend this book highly enough.

This book will definitely open your eyes. Very informative and easy to read. I just started reading again. I used to read a lot as a child. Now that I’m experiencing a spiritual journey & self love, I can truly say my intuition on ordering this book and reading this first gave me a new look at life and the confirmation to a lot of things I had already believed. I just chose to ignore. We are humans so we aren’t going to be perfect. What matters is that we recognize ourselves before trying to recognize the world. Once u find out who you are as a person and what your purpose is, u experience “LIFE CAN BE HEAVEN ON EARTH”. I hope this helps someone!!!

Everyone should read this book. It changed my life, and I am now reading it with my kids. I recommend this book to everyone. The four agreements in this book are now values that govern how I think and how I react, or don't react. It has taught me about myself and others, and has made me more perceptive of others and more in control of my actions and reactions. I highly recommend this read. Although it is a bit wordy and can be a little hard to understand (for younger audiences), the core beliefs of this book are solid and transformative.

The wisdom in this book has completely transformed my life, more than anything thing else I've ever read or meditated on. This is not hyperbole. The Four Agreements showed up in my suggested titles, as I've purchased books on Buddhism and meditation. It was relatively inexpensive so I thought, "why not?" Once I began the chapter on the First Agreement, I found myself resting my eyes on phrases, sentences, and truths that just stood out from the page with child-like simplicity and tremendous depth. As I started to unpack what I was learning, I cried some good tears. This happened over and over, like the wounds in my soul were beginning to heal. They were healing through my active attention and I learned how to speak to myself without being judgmental. I thought I already knew how to do this through meditation and therapy, but this book uncovers something for me that I just can't explain. I don't want to give away too much of this book, because the way everything is explained is so brilliant and builds in layers. The way it is told is important. You can feel the kind and loving intent within every word. This book is very easy to read and understand; you really don't need advanced philosophy to move mountains of the mind. I feel like Don Miguel Ruiz is right next to me, gently and lovingly help me to see the real beauty in me, the real beauty in the universe and how we are all connected. It has the same force of an elder looking you in the eyes and telling you truths that come from years and years of contemplation, experience and wisdom. The best part is that I'm learning how to be me, really me. I'm learning how to love me, not things *about* me, but the real me way down inside that doesn't have to puff up or put up guards. I'm learning to be vulnerable and relate to others with far less fear and self-doubt. What a gift. What a treasure.

What can we do to improve ourselves as humans? There are thousands of recipes for self- improvement and no end to the number of books written on the subject. One book that is simpler and easier to understand that others is The Four Agreements, a philosophical/self- help book that aims to make you a better person. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, this book outlines four broad, simple goals that will help each one of us gain more freedom over our lives and improve as people. The four truths are: Being impeccable with your word; not taking things personally; not making assumptions; and always doing your best. The first one, about being true/impeccable to your words, forms the groundwork for the other truths. This book’s greatest strength is its simplicity. It doesn’t get bogged down in philosophical lingo and this fact makes it a good choice for those who appreciate philosophy, but who get tired of philosophical books that require a bachelor’s degree and access to a dictionary to understand. The book is a quick read and the way it is written, anyone can directly grasp its key points. The Four Agreements and its advice are things that have been said in one form or another by other philosophy books and/or self- help books. The message can get a little repetitive as you read, but I didn’t mind because I feel like this is the type of general advice that needs to be drilled into your head. The more you hear it, the more it will hopefully ring true and the more likely you will be to take action. I read this book in a single sitting, while I was on an airplane flying home from vacation. I agreed with and liked what I read and immediately started to think about my own life and how well I am living up to these four agreements. I would rate myself around eighty; meaning, I feel that I am following these words of wisdom about 80 percent of the time. There is still room for improvement, but I feel like I am ahead of most people. If I had any issue with this book, it is that it does tend to speak in absolutist terms more than I would prefer. It seems to think that everyone is going to be better off and see improvement if they follow this advice, no exceptions. This, of course, is not the case. Will most humans improve their lives and freedom if they follow what this book says? Yes, absolutely. But there will always be exceptions to the rule. Self- improvement is a huge industry and books like The Four Agreements are useful for those who want to live a better, happier, more fulfilling life and need general guidance to reach their goals. This book is about as straightforward as you can get and the ease of reading and no- nonsense approach is just what humanity needs to work out our problems and be all we can be.

My thoughts continue to evolve about an axis of two books I have read recently. For those of you who read books (a vanishing breed it seems to me) they are, _The Four Agreements_ and _Getting Real_. In some ways I think these books compliment each other perfectly. In Getting Real we have a practical way of living life after you accept The Four Agreements (TFA). I don't know if the authors know each other but that is how I view their books. In any case, TFA is an interesting take on the concepts I have long held regarding the Universe but it expands on them and as such was really an amazing book to read. The things I already knew about life and my place in it were not very helpful in making me a happy person but Ruiz has put together a suggested framework where one CAN be happy when you know what "we" know. For myself I see Getting Real as one way of implementing parts of the Four Agreements. Let me try to explain briefly...as if that is possible. In the TFA, Ruiz is essentially making the case that life, as we know it, is a dream. Further, he makes the powerful assertion that the current world we live in is embroiled in a dream of hell (for reasons related to the four agreements). He suggests we need not die to go to hell because we are already there. I tend to agree. Through his Four Agreements a method wherein we can walk through this hell and be unaffected is put forward. In some ways I think his way of looking at this is dangerous because it _can_ create truly self-centered monsters who believe they are God of the universe. That may not even be a false assertion but how many people are evolved enough to handle that kind of power and not make the rest of us miserable in the process? I think he underestimates, somewhat, the role other people play in our dream of the world. To say we can live a life utterly unaffected by others...well I don't quite like it or buy it. Perhaps it is too "Ivory Tower" for my sensabilities. That, I believe, is where Getting Real comes in. In this book the author, whose name escapes me, suggests a method for getting closer to the people in your life by being authentic with others regarding your feelings, thoughts, emotions. I have actually used some of the techniques in the book and they have worked beyond my expectations so I know it is a useful text but it is the kind of book you have to read for yourself. It is not easy reading and has several exercises to help one Get Real. In any case, I think if you combine the two books what you get is a framework for accepting the truths Ruiz puts forward (that I tend to agree with) with a practical method for living with your fellow humans that does not downgrade them to the level of mere bit players in an external dream of hell. I'd recommend reading Illusions Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah, then The Four Agreements and then Getting Real. Getting Real is last because it is the toughest book to get through (at least it was for me). Illusions is an interesting and fun book and will be a painless introduction to the concepts underlying TFA. ...I am torn. On the one hand I can understand how this book is "incomplete" and I think Ruiz acknowledges that by writing a companion book. But at the same time, for a person already thinking about these truths Ruiz speaks of, it is a great extension/angle of looking at them. If you were already asking "What is the matrix?" then this is a great addition to your library. If you disliked the book maybe this is all too new to you and I'd strongly suggest you read the books I suggested in the order I suggested. If you have lots of time you can even start with the writings of St. Thomas Aquinas.

I think it takes a certain person to truly understand this book’s message and I’d like to believe this book came to me at right time wherein I possess such understanding in being. Overall, I think it was beautifully written, and although it’s such a short book, it holds so much wisdom. I would definitely read it again.

It was a good book. Simple, I shared.

The Four Agreements is a practical guide to personal freedom, based on Toltec ancient Wisdom. The Toltec lived in southern Mexico and were known for their knowledge. According to the Toltecs, gaining personal freedom seems to be achievable for those who pay attention to the four (positive) agreements to improve their own lifes. Agreements can be chosen in the past, such as destructive behaviours and limiting beliefs about oneself. To improve, it is necessary to become aware of old agreements and get rid of them. Dissolving old agreements can be reached firstly by taking care of the usage of words as they are a powerful means and can be very destructive. Secondly by not taking anything personally in a negative or positive way. Thirdly it's very wise to avoid making assumptions about someone and asking questions instead to build up a clearer perspective. Fourthly, after paying attention to the first three agreements, but especially being conscious of the impact of words, one should always give the best in life. All the agreements sound rather simple to maintain, but at the beginning of the book, the author stresses, that sticking to these four "rules" requires a strong will and can't probably be achieved within a short period of time, since old agreements must first be dissolved and replaced. All in all, this book is very fascinating to read. It's a rather short read but provides enough information about the Toltec's philosophy.

Such a great book, so insightful. And also, a very easy read. Was done reading this book in less than a day. Great read.

very interesting book which in my perspective teaches us how to be aligned with ourselves and to free ourselves from people's expectations, a bit of stoicism in it

Waste of paper, time and money. It could have been a set of four post-its with one agreement on each.

Best book ever. And good quality