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'A groundbreaking book that redefines what it means to be in a relationship.' โ John Gray, PhD., bestselling author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus Is there a science to love? In this groundbreaking book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel S. F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory โ the most advanced relationship science in existence today โ can help us find and sustain love. Pioneered by psychologist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the field of attachment explains that each of us behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: Anxious people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partnerโs ability to love them back. Avoidant people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness. Secure people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving. With fascinating psychological insight, quizzes and case studies, Dr Amir Levine and Rachel Heller help you understand the three attachment styles, identify your own and recognise the styles of others so that you can find compatible partners or improve your existing relationship. An insightful look at the science behind love, Attached offers readers a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections. Review: Great book. - Is it worth weighing in gold Review: Great intro to attachment theory - This book is the OG in attachment theory and romantic relationships. I don't agree with all the points, but it's a great beginner book for someone wanting to know more about attachment theory in their romantic relationships.








| Best Sellers Rank | #19,884 in Books ( See Top 100 in Books ) #43 in Dating (Books) #103 in Marriage #121 in Love & Romance (Books) |
| Customer Reviews | 4.7 out of 5 stars 8,694 Reviews |
A**R
Great book.
Is it worth weighing in gold
P**S
Great intro to attachment theory
This book is the OG in attachment theory and romantic relationships. I don't agree with all the points, but it's a great beginner book for someone wanting to know more about attachment theory in their romantic relationships.
S**G
Informative
I bought this audio book and listened to it in 3 days! I couldnโt stop listening. Very informative, simple to understand and makes the reader/ listener take an introspective look at themselves. The author also inspires change to develop a healthy attachment style and offers tips to do so. I will listen to it again as Iโm sure Iโll pick up more information that I missed the first time. Also bought as a gift because itโs so good!
T**N
Amazingly insightful and helpful book
This will become one of those books that I frequently gift to friends. I read it in one weekend, and was amazed to recognize not only myself (anxious) but also a recent ex that I can't seem to get out from under my skin. (he's textbook avoidant) It really helped to process some feelings of "what did I do wrong?" However, I do agree with many of the reviews - it left me wanting MORE. How can an anxious and an avoidant work it out? Surely it can be done in some cases. And aside from picturing a secure relationship (not many come to mind in my world), what are ways I can do some self work to address my anxious attachment style? I would definitely read a "sequel" to this book, with more tips and insight. Some of the improvement suggestions felt glossed over, where I'd rather have a whole second book. The writing is easy to read and not overly scientific and the relationship examples were easily relatable.
N**N
The most important book I have ever read.
If you have perpetual struggles with relationships, Attached should be a book you read. Then read it again. Them re read it. I have hundreds of books on various topics related to psychology, self help, personal transformation, and the list continues. Attached is the most important by a country mile! Followed by Mindset by Carol Dweck and then Feeling Great by Dr. David Burns. In fact if you read only these three books and deeply internalise them and implement what you read, it will double if not triple your chances of a happy, healthy and rewarding life. Here is why Attached is #1: 1. 73% of over 300 college grads surveyed said they will forego all their life goals if they could have a great relationship (luckily you can have it all) 2. If you are of the 50% of people who do not have a secure attachment style, you cannot succeed in relationships unless you are with someone that is. Not possible 3. If you find yourself perpetually on dating apps, you will perpetually date other avoidants and anxious attached people. Secures donโt use dating apps - there is now hard science to back this up 4. Most self help advise that tells you that you have to be the only person you love and rely on is BS. There is no clinical evidence that this is is true and this book will back it up 5. There is nothing that will bring more joy, or misery, to a personโs life than relationships, not only romantic. Nothing! But you already know this. Why not study the one science that can make the single biggest needle moving difference in your life? It just makes sense Trust me on this. Buy the book. Read it slowly, cover to cover. Then read it again to pick up everything you missed. Its truly that important.
J**N
The only book you need to find true you!
This book definitely helped and healed me in so many ways. I recommend it to anyone who wants to be self aware of their own patterns and change them and find a true relationship when the time is right.
E**Y
Very informative and helpful
Love this book an think everyone should read it. Chances are you know someone and have dated someone with either an anxious or avoidant attachment. My therapist recommended it to me and I'm so glad she did. I have bought it for several friends now as well
C**N
Definitely worth every penny!
Great book!
S**H
informative and interesting
a good read to learn more of yourself. understanding differences within frictions
A**D
Excellent essential reading for everyone...
I highly recommend this book and just wish I had come across it many, many years ago... If you experienced childhood, attachment wounds, you must read this book. It is particularly helpful for Anxious Attachment types, which I am, and is quite simply life-changing, healing and incredibly helpful going forwards. I urge you to read it to understand and change your own relationships approaches, patterns and needs, as well of those you're in or might be in a relationship with. And although the focus is on romantic relationships, the principles and insights readily carry-over into all of our relationships. It's also very helpful for healing our feelings and thoughts around our past relationships, particularly those we've viewed up until now as disastrous, as there were VERY good scientific, biological reasons WHY we chose or kept choosing that type of partner.
S**A
Taught me about me and others
This is one of the books that made an impact on my life. Taught me so much about myself and about other people, specifically when in a relationship. I think this book together with โMan are from Mars and Women from Venusโ are the ABC of a healthy relationship. Just start with this two for the basics.
O**N
Excellent book
This book was excellent and recommended to me by my therapist. Easy to read with great tips. Strongly recommend to pretty much anyone
ู**ุฉ
Don't purchase
Very long stories to get selly conclusion. The book also very small with cheap ink and small litter
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