The Power of Showing Up: How Parental Presence Shapes Who Our Kids Become and How Their Brains Get Wired
Product ID: 131917464
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Parenting isn’t easy. Showing up is. Your greatest impact begins right where you are. N ow the bestselling authors of The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline explain what this means over the course of childhood. “There is parenting magic in this book.”—Michael Thompson, Ph.D., co-author of the New York Times bestselling classic Raising Cain One of the very best scientific predictors for how any child turns out—in terms of happiness, academic success, leadership skills, and meaningful relationships—is whether at least one adult in their life has consistently shown up for them. In an age of scheduling demands and digital distractions, showing up for your child might sound like a tall order. But as bestselling authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson reassuringly explain, it doesn’t take a lot of time, energy, or money. Instead, showing up means offering a quality of presence. And it’s simple to provide once you understand the four building blocks of a child’s healthy development. Every child needs to feel what Siegel and Bryson call the Four S’s: • Safe: We can’t always insulate a child from injury or avoid doing something that leads to hurt feelings. But when we give a child a sense of safe harbor, she will be able to take the needed risks for growth and change. • Seen: Truly seeing a child means we pay attention to his emotions—both positive and negative—and strive to attune to what’s happening in his mind beneath his behavior. • Soothed: Soothing isn’t about providing a life of ease; it’s about teaching your child how to cope when life gets hard, and showing him that you’ll be there with him along the way. A soothed child knows that he’ll never have to suffer alone. • Secure: When a child knows she can count on you, time and again, to show up—when you reliably provide safety, focus on seeing her, and soothe her in times of need, she will trust in a feeling of secure attachment. And thrive! Based on the latest brain and attachment research, The Power of Showing Up shares stories, scripts, simple strategies, illustrations, and tips for honoring the Four S’s effectively in all kinds of situations—when our kids are struggling or when they are enjoying success; when we are consoling, disciplining, or arguing with them; and even when we are apologizing for the times we don’t show up for them. Demonstrating that mistakes and missteps are repairable and that it’s never too late to mend broken trust, this book is a powerful guide to cultivating your child’s healthy emotional landscape. Review: Excellent book on attachment science! - I read this book last year during a parent coaching program and it is absolutely excellent! They discuss how to show up with safety for our children not just physical safety, but emotional and psychological safety and how to build a secure attachment with our children. A secure attachment with our parents is the foundation to becoming a secure adult. This book shows you how to do that. This book emphasizes the basic needs we have in relationship which is to feel safe, seen, soothed, and secure. Review: Insightful and practical - Even if the children are grown, there is still a lot that can be done. For them and for ourselves. I love being able to reclaim my past without judgement and a clear forward path.
| Best Sellers Rank | #423,934 in Books ( See Top 100 in Books ) #19 in Medical Child Psychology #41 in Popular Child Psychology #121 in Sociology Reference |
| Customer Reviews | 4.8 out of 5 stars 1,376 Reviews |
A**.
Excellent book on attachment science!
I read this book last year during a parent coaching program and it is absolutely excellent! They discuss how to show up with safety for our children not just physical safety, but emotional and psychological safety and how to build a secure attachment with our children. A secure attachment with our parents is the foundation to becoming a secure adult. This book shows you how to do that. This book emphasizes the basic needs we have in relationship which is to feel safe, seen, soothed, and secure.
W**R
Insightful and practical
Even if the children are grown, there is still a lot that can be done. For them and for ourselves. I love being able to reclaim my past without judgement and a clear forward path.
R**K
Brain, Emotion, and Behavior Connection
Based on brain attachment research the book successfully posits that the key to a child’s developmental and functional success is in creating strong attachments by simply showing up. Showing up means providing four key but necessary conditions the children in order for their brains to remain calm and attached to the care giver: Safety so the child can feel confident in taking risks. Seen so there’s an understanding of the emotion. Soothing iso the child can cope with your steady support. Security so the child is assured they she can count on you consistently. This book is invaluable for any parent or professional who works with trauma informed children. Understanding the connection between the brain, emotions and behaviors will help you to better understand and support the child.
B**P
Amazing book
Very clear and relatable, a lot to add to ones parenting and understanding ones parenting and relationship with ones children based on upbringing as a child. Very helpful and a lot to think about. Really opens the door for attachment understanding
K**N
Solid mental model for emotionally supporting your kids
The book helps you build a mental model for how to emotionally support your kids that can be applied throughout parenting from infant to adolescence. Appreciated the vignettes and tactical actions paired with the theory of secure attachment.
M**M
Excellent read
I bought this for a college class and it’s an excellent read. Came in great condition. This book is for anyone to read even if you aren’t a parent!
M**S
Really important
This book was really important for me. I had broken my attachment to my children through not caring for myself and harsh parenting. I didn’t understand what had gone wrong, and it hurt me so deeply. I felt like I was in a cycle of unending disappointment. I learned in this book that my kids were actually showing me their need for me when they got upset and that it was an opportunity to soothe them. I found so much hope because I learned that I could heal my mistakes and my past. I am so grateful to these authors because they gave me the hope and practical tips I needed to remember who I was before the depression set in. It showed me that I also had a chance to heal my children’s future and make a way for my grandchildren to have a better life if my children decide to have them. I’m so grateful. I have learned to show up for myself, to be more self-compassionate and to give myself the safety I need so that I will be able to help my children better.
A**R
very informative
Wow. A really great perspective and roadmap to help better understand how we parent and how we can do a better job with secure attachment.
S**T
Give me something I can use
Lots of stories to fill the pages but not much of practical advice.
K**Y
Good read
Fast delivery and a book worth reading.
K**Y
.
Item as described. Arrived promptly
M**T
Happy days
I recomend.
A**H
Paper quantity is rubbish
Paper quantity of this book is extremely bad, especially when you pay 1100 rupees for the book. It felt like a duplicate copy of a novel.
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